I'd like to ask you a few questions. Be open and honest with yourself as you answer them...
Have you ever met a guy who seemed to be "Mr. Right", but after getting to know him better you could tell that he just didn't feel that same level of "connection" you felt?
You were attracted to him, but he just wasn't into you the same way you were into him?
In your mind, you could sense what a great guy he was, and that, somewhere deep inside, you both shared this strong "chemistry" that made you feel close and comfortable. But for some reason he didn't want to truly connect with you.
Have you ever slept with a guy very quickly after meeting him, but as it started to happen you got that sinking feeling in your stomach? You knew it was a mistake, but you did it anyway. And then the thing you KNEW would happen actually happened: He unexplainably disappeared from your life. Honestly, have you ever had this happen?
Of course, the worst part wasn't that it happened, but that you KNEW you shouldn't have done it in the first place... but you did it anyway.
Have you ever dated a great guy for a long time... I'm talking about six months, twelve months, or even longer... and it was getting to the point where you needed to have "the talk" with him. But when you tried to bring up the topic of having a relationship and making a bigger commitment, his eyes just glazed over... and then he became distant from you... and the relationship ended soon after?
You were trying to get CLOSER to him, and somehow he kept moving farther AWAY from you.
I'm guessing that when one of these things happened, your girlfriends said things like:
"He's just a jerk, forget about him".
Or they said: "He doesn't see the mistake he's making or what he'll be missing". But he never seemed to see these mistakes... or even miss you.
And the worst part of all: You kept thinking about it.
In fact, it really GOT TO YOU. And I'll bet the REASON why it got to you is because you worried that it might have been something to do with YOU (and not just because he was a total jerk).
In fact, TO THIS DAY you still have the feeling that YOU may have done something wrong, and that you may have CAUSED some of the problems in the first place... and if you would have known the RIGHT thing to do, things would have turned out differently...
Unfortunately, the bad news is that you're probably right.
Chances are you DID have something to do with it, and things probably WOULD have turned out differently if you would have known how to deal with the situation.
You COULD have done something about it... if only you had known WHAT to do...
Just because your girlfriends told you it wasn't your fault, or that he was just "a jerk", doesn't mean that they understood the problem (or that they understand men at all, for that matter).
Most women don't "get" men. Your friends who try to comfort and encourage you have good intentions. They're just trying to make you feel better.
But they're also accidentally making the situation WORSE.
They're trying to blame the situation on HIM, instead of trying to help YOU understand how to KEEP a great guy around.
This situation is MOST dangerous when you meet a really GREAT GUY, but you don't know how to catch him or keep him. Let's face it, great guys are hard to find... and when you do find one, you can't afford to lose him because you made a dumb mistake.
You can't afford to throw away a good six months, a year... or even LONGER... and risk losing what could be a valuable relationship... just because you didn't know how to handle a particular situation.
Well, there is some good news here... I personally believe that there IS something you can do about it.
You CAN learn how to understand men and get them to be open up and understand you. You can learn how to CATCH that great guy, and how to KEEP him.
And how do I know this?
Because I AM a guy. And I've been in all the situations I just mentioned to you... from the OTHER side.
I've seen it from a man's perspective. I've been in those difficult "places" in dating, relationships, and love.
After years and years of experiencing these types of situations and hearing about them from my female friends, I decided to DO SOMETHING ABOUT IT...
I spent well over a year carefully documenting and writing about my experiences. I spent much of that time researching, interviewing women, and working out all the ways a woman can get what she wants out of a relationship without scaring off the man she loves... and without letting any of those confusing "guy issues" get in the way.
Sadly, even confident women often "accidentally" give off one of these signs... and just one can kill the chance of a man asking you on a second date.
As you read through these signals men pick up on as "needy" and unattractive, ask yourself if YOU have ever been guilty of committing one of these deadly mistakes:
- Talking or saying nasty things about your past boyfriends. Saying bad things about men you have been involved with actually reflects the negatively back on YOU. It makes a man worry you are carrying around "baggage" that HE will have to deal with should he become involved with you.
- Speaking negatively about other women. When women call other women names like "slut", "bitch", and "crazy", it is anything but impressive to a man you are attracted you. Women will often do this when they see a good looking, desirable woman, especially if they feel their man might be attracted to her. This just makes a man think you are trying to cover up your own insecurities, and looking for validation and attention. Not good.
- Too much physical contact, especially in public.If you are constantly hanging on a man or touching him too much he'll start to see it as clingy behavior... but you'll never hear about this from him. It's far better to save your touches for short and infrequent moments that will surprise and enchant him.
The next 3 are far deadlier, but less obvious... and it's important that you learn what they are and how to avoid giving them off.
But before I show you how to do that, let's talk about mistake #2:
» Mistake #2: Appealing To His "Sexual" Side Instead Of His Emotional Side
Many women make the mistake of thinking that men are primarily driven by sex alone... and think if they can attract a man SEXUALLY they will be able to attract him EMOTIONALLY as well.
Women too often give up sex to a man in the hopes that it will translate into a relationship and get them what they want. In reality, a man has the capacity to view a sexual connection and an emotional connection as two entirely different things, and it requires a special set of skills to mold these two things together in a man's mind... and keep them connected.
Men are out for far more than just sex... and a woman who knows how to fulfill a man EMOTIONALLY and SEXUALLY will be the woman who captures a man's heart... and gets that same fulfillment for HERSELF. In a moment, I'll show you how you can learn to do just that...
» Mistake #3: Not Knowing How To Size Up A Man's "Relationship Potential"
A lot of women will decide whether or not they should put energy into building a relationship with a man based on ATTRACTION.
Yes, attraction is important. But it can also be DANGEROUS.
When we feel a strong sense of attraction for someone, it can cause us to override our logic and ignore our instincts... leading us to overlook potential partner's deadly faults that could spell trouble down the road.
If you've ever found yourself stuck in a relationship that is dragging you down, this is probably why.
It's important to be able to size a guy up and spot any "warning signs" of a future bad relationship FAST... so you don't waste any of your time or emotional energy on someone who isn't right for you... or who will leave you heartbroken. Fortunately this is a fairly easy thing to do, and I'd like to show you how...